Fish fans, I still haven't made it to the Spider-Man movie. I hear good things, though. I still really really really want to go.

Hopefully tonight. Followed by the Official Snack Food of the Gods, Krispy Kreme original glazed donuts. Yums all around.

Eric, how did your dogs do in the dog show thing you talked about in such great depth a couple days ago?

Well, friend, thank you for asking. You always ask such great (albeit general) questions. I love you for that.

The Dog Stuff started off early on Saturday morning. Around 9am (on a Saturday! ouch.) Lindsay and I loaded up the V Dub with the kennels, the dogs, her Klay9 stuff and headed off to Hugo, MN, just north of St. Paul.

Unfortunately for our stupid asses, we ended up missing the Hugo exit and drove 20 minutes past it before we finally stopped and asked for directions.

We finally got to the Dog Stuff and immediately Oscar and Bailey started barking and screaming and yelling. There were about 100 fellow dog dorks and more than 100 Jack Russell Terriers there, so we weren't alone. We were just the last ones there. Typical.

Lindsay and I took the dogs to the GTG setup right away. Lindsay knew what she was doing there, I must say. The dogs were going nuts -- I think they could smell the little caged mice. Instinct!

The line was pretty short, so we didn't have to wait long to get in. Lindsay took Oscar in first, and Bailey, the alpha dog, was indignant about not being the first to go. She bitched Lindsay and Oscar out before during and after because of the change in the pecking order.

Both of the dogs did pretty well. Ro did better than Guhl, he had an easier course, but he surprised me with how well he did. Bailey was a little slow to navigate the tunnel, but did a good job once she got to the mice. Let me tell you what, though: the dogs were completely different after the GTG. Completely. They just pranced around and smiled after that. Calm. Good times.

ZZZZZZZZ. All this dog stuff. Boring. Anything fun to say?

That is bordering on not-so-nice territory, buddy. If you don't like the dog stuff, this isn't the place for you right now.

Our next event was conformation for Bailey. Oscar got to watch from the comfort of his very own kennel. Hee. I was Bailey's handler, too. My first time doing such a thing -- the last time she showed 1) I wasn't there and 2) Lindsay's friend gladly did it.

I basically had very little idea what I was doing. Typical. So I followed the people that looked like they knew what they were doing and did what they did. With plans like this, you've gotta wonder why I'm not a multi-millionaire yet. Basically, we circled the square-shaped ring one time so the judge could see all the dogs move and all that. Then we settled in a line, all of us facing the surly male judge. He then called each handler to bring their dog up, one by one, to check them for breed standards, span their chest, etc. (The dogs, not the handlers. He wasn't spanning my chest.)

When the judge was spanning each of the previous dogs' chests, they sat there, docile and content. Hee... Then it was Bailey's turn. "How long have you had her?" "We got her when she was 2 and we've had her for 2 years," I said. "Mmmm hmmmm," he added, beginning to pick her up to span her chest (thereby rendering anything I could do to control Bailey useless). "She'll probably try to jump in your face," I cautioned.

She wriggled and made horse-like noises and then -- uh, oh -- she jumped up and bumped him in the nose. Hard.

"Thank you, that's good."

I sheepishly took Bailey back to where we were standing. She smiled at Lindsay, like she was saying "Haw haw haw. See whut Ah did? Isn't that fun-ny?"

Meanwhile, the judge had pulled out a hanky and started to dab his now bleeding nose.

Ouch.

Then came the judging... Bailey got 2nd place in the Rescue Class!

Lindsay and I later learned 2 things that made this funny and interesting. 1) When the judge motioned to me to bring Bailey up to him, one of the other handlers said to one of Lindsay's friends (also handling a dog in the class) "That's a rescue?" Hee... Bailey is a pretty dog, I'm telling you! 2) When the judge announced to the person that was writing everything down and handing the results to the announcer, he said "... and second place goes to the dog that got me in the nose". Hee... Funny stuff.

Since Bailey placed in the top 2 of the Rescue class, she was eligible to come back later for the best in class of the entire Companion group. She ended up getting 2nd in the entire Companion class -- out of 20 or so other top 2 dogs. Hee... I was proud -- and so was Guhl. Fun stuff.

Sunday was the racing day. Since she wasn't racing, we left Bailey at home (she would not have behaved well) and got there... ahem... later than we'd wanted. Typical. At least we got the right exit on the highway right away this time.

Oscar has raced 1 or 2 other times before, once that I've seen. The time I saw him, he did pretty badly. He hopped after the lure like a bunny and didn't actually finish. It was cute and funny, though. Lindsay and I were, you could say, apprehensive over how he'd do.

A couple things about racing. To start the race, all the handlers put their muzzled dogs inside the start box. Did this go smoothly, dude? No, dude. Not at all. First, Oscar's muzzle slipped off and it took about 4 minutes to get it back on and tightened -- meanwhile 5 other dogs and handlers are waiting on me to fix the situation. Second, Oscar, the escape artist, would go in the start box, but wouldn't let me close the thing without trying very hard to escape, the little bastard. So that was an adventure.

Then the race. He ended up getting 4th place out of 6 dogs... much better than either of us had expected. He chased the lure, not the other dogs, and went into the hole in the hay at the end (that's the finish line). Then, of course, he escaped back out onto the track and ran around for 2 minutes. Ha.

In his race, 2 of the 6 dogs were absolute ringers. They got 1st and 2nd, the bastards. So, really, Oscar only got beat by 1 real dog, and he beat 2 others.

Good times. That's about all I've got for now...
Eric